Shattered and Broken

It’s been a while, to say the least, since my last blog post. I took some time off from posting and then when I thought I would begin again, I received a negative comment regarding my blog that just completely shut me down from writing. In the last few weeks, I have been listening to the Tony Evans series on Detours. If you find yourself asking “How” and “Why” and “What” questions of God, this series is encouraging!

Writing has always been an outlet for me to sort of “work out” my thoughts, my circumstances and what I’m hearing from God. I could sense Him urging me to pay attention, be watchful and take note of some things happening around me.  This seemed like the perfect time to get back to writing, let God lead the way and see what unfolds.

This week, I began the online Bible study of Ann Voskamp’s TheBroken Way. I’m not sure where I will end up as I walk this path, but I do know that I’m on the broken path. Too often, outside forces are pressing hard and not relenting, more often than I’d like, I find myself crying out as the Psalmist did:

My God, my Rock, why have you forgotten me? Why do I go mourning because of the oppression of the enemy? – Psalm 42:9

And I pray:

Send out your light and your truth; let them lead me. – Psalm 43:3

These two chapters are replete with the exhortation to:

Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation and my God.

I don’t know what’s ahead, but I do find encouragement in knowing He is my hope.

The week leading up to the start of this Bible study on TheBroken Way, I experienced some broken things…

My one year old disobeyed and opened a cabinet that he knows he is not supposed to open. He proceeded to pull out a glass baking dish that shattered as soon as it hit the ceramic tile floor. The crashing sound of the breaking glass was loud and it seemed like thousands of pieces large and small, to tiny little slivers of glass surrounded his feet and covered the kitchen floor and beyond. I quickly picked him up out of the brokenness and carefully washed his feet. Then I vacuumed the floor several times just to make sure every last sliver was picked up. As I did this, I thought about how many warnings God gives us about things and if we keep on after something when He has warned us it is not good, something may break and shatter into a thousand pieces. We may get hurt, others may get hurt, there may be irreparable damage. Just as I was disappointed in my little one, God may be disappointed in us, but in His love, He will pick us up and wash us off. In our disobedience, His mercy can limit some of the hurt of our actions. With the dish, the only thing to do was throw the pieces out and buy a new one.

Later that week, after washing his hands, my husband turned quickly and as he did, his wedding ring flew off and hit the ceramic tile floor. His ring shattered into a few pieces with one piece ending up on the counter top clear on the other side of the kitchen. As I looked for pieces of his ring, I thought how some things shatter and break and the only thing you can do is take it back to the maker for a new one.

The third broken thing that crossed my path over the week was the remote entry key to my car. Sometimes when things are broken, we can bandage them as a temporary fix.

But, ultimately we have to let the manufacturer replace the parts that are broken.

All of this brokenness in one week’s time, starting a Bible study on the broken way, feeling broken in ways I never thought I would, God is up to something and He has my attention.

In the first chapter of her book, Ann writes: What in God’s holy name do you do when it feels like you’re broken and cut up, and love has failed, and you’ve failed, and you feel like Somebody’s love has failed you?

I don’t know how deeper will this trial go – how much pain and suffering it will bring me. This does not worry me anymore; I leave this to him as I leave everything else.

•        GOD HAS NOT FORGOTTEN YOU
•        GOD HAS NOT ABANDONED YOU
•     GOD'S LOVE IS AROUND YOU EVERYWHERE

Feeling like I have messed up and taken the wrong path, this encourages me to hope in the Lord. For his mercies never fail. Even when we create the detour along a broken way. He is still on His throne, He has a plan and a purpose. I’m still hoping for His best to break through.

We never stop hoping for the best, waiting for the best like it got lost in the mail.  – TheBroken Way